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Funny Facebook statuses
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We`re friends. You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You jump off a bridge, I get on my boat and save your retarded ass.
Status By: Olivia
Buy a ship. Name it relation. Go inside and sit in it. You are in a relationship.
Status By: anonymous
Some people hear voices.. Some see invisible people.. Others have no imagination whatsoever.
Status By: Dorian
Today I sent out a text saying, “Hey, I lost my phone, will you call it?” 12 people called me…I need smarter friends
Status By: Ronde
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Status By: Ronde
"Hey can I borrow a pencil?" "Yeah, but it doesn`t have an eraser." "Life doesn`t have an eraser." "Dude...that was deep. Here you go..."
Status By: anonymous
"THIS IS THE POLICE! OPEN UP!"..."not with that attitude."
Status By: anonymous
"What mouse has two legs?" "I dont know." "Mickey Mouse!"
"What duck has two legs?" "Donald Duck?"
"No all ducks you retard."
Status By: anonymous
they say that 70% percent of people doesn`t finish what they start. well i think that...
Status By: anonymous
Dentist: "Doing any fun stuff this summer?"
Me:"Agragaaaghagraggaa"
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