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Funny Facebook statuses
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If you were home alone in the middle of the night, and you heard a fart, would you laugh or be scared?
Status By: Jake
Ha! I just finished a puzzle in 8 months and the box said 2-3 years!
Status By: Jake
"I wasn`t that drunk..." "Dude, you were in my bathroom begging my sponge for the krabby patty formula."
Status By: anonymous
If “plan A” didn’t work, the alphabet has 25 more letters. Stay Cool.
Status By: anonymous
Awwww you`re not fat. Now chin up!...... and the other one too. :)
Status By: anonymous
I need a new girlfriend, my imaginary one lied to me & said she was real.
Status By: Mando
I`m fluffy and I know it! I Munch out! Jiggle, Jiggle, Jiggle, yea! Jiggle, Jiggle, Jiggle yea!!!
Status By: Mando
No matter how old you are... if a little kid shoots you with a toy gun, you act dead.
Status By: anonymous
A cop pulled me over and said ``Papers...`` So I said, ``Scissors, I win!`` and drove off like a boss!
Status By: anonymous
Clapping the longest during an assembly because you`re a fearless bastard.
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