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Funny Facebook statuses
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Every mother on earth gave birth to a child. Except my mother, she gave birth to a legend.
Status By: anonymous
Roses are red. Monsters are green. Just look in the mirror. You`ll know what I mean.
Status By: anonymous
do you think clouds look down on people and think “that ones shaped like an idiot”
Status By: anonymous
never look back... unless an attractive stranger is behind you.
Status By: Jose Juan
" Hm. Teenagers. They think they know everything. You give them an inch, they swim all over you. " -The Little Mermaid
Status By: anonymous
I don`t care how old you are... when the ketchup bottle farts, it`s funny.
Status By: anonymous
In high school, teachers had to raise up their hand to speak to Chuck Norris.
Status By: anonymous
That depressing moment when you realize the trash goes out more than you...
Status By: anonymous
My voice sounds great when I`m singing with my earphones on, Then I take them off and I realize I sound like a dying walrus.
Status By: anonymous
nipple is a bad word. say “sensitive chest raisin" instead.
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