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Funny Facebook statuses
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That lion king moment, when you hold your phone in the air to get a better reception..
Status By: anonymous
*a teacher goes on a date*
guy: can I kiss you.
teacher: I don`t know, CAN you?
Status By: anonymous
If a mouse family ever stole my smart phone and used it as a flat screen TV, then I`m ok with it, as long as they`re happy.
Status By: Arif
Not trying to impress you..... but I can play the triangle
Status By: anonymous
2011: I`m sexy and I know it. - 1836: I`m physically attractive and I`m aware of this statement.
Status By: anonymous
If you were a vegetable, you`d be a cabBITCH.
Status By: anonymous
You know you`re ugly when you call yourself ugly and no one disagrees with you.
Status By: anonymous
Boy: So, you like bad boys? Girl: Yeah. Boy: Well, not to impress you or anything but at Walmart I enter through the exit door.
Status By: anonymous
I`m not saying I hate you, I`m just saying if we were being chased by zombies, I would trip you.
Status By: anonymous
To do list: 1. Buy a parrot. 2. Teach the parrot to say, "Help!! I turned into a parrot!" 3. Leave it in a public area.
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