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Facebook statuses
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When I was a kid, the only fake friends I had were invisible ones.
Status By: anonymous
Black Friday = Broke Saturday.
Status By: anonymous
When people come over and your mom suddenly becomes the nicest woman in the world…
Status By: anonymous
When someone texts you “hahahahaha!!” instead of “haha” or “lol”, you know you’ve done well.
Status By: anonymous
I don`t let my friends do stupid things... ALONE.
Status By: anonymous
That awkward moment when you`ve been raising your hand for so long it starts to take that HEIL HITLER angle at the teacher...
Status By: anonymous
Trust me when I woke up today I had no plans to be awesome, but shit happens.
Status By: anonymous
LIKE IF you also think the turtle in Finding Nemo was stoned off his ass.
Status By: anonymous
If you say `woman` fast enough it sounds like `make me a sandwich`.
Status By: anonymous
Is constantly torn between being a good person or a sarcastic little prick.
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